Everyone Likes Games!

Getting to know a person is complicated. People are often elusive and quick to hide the hideous monster they are inside. Here are a series of tests and games you can play on your date thus furthering yourself from any real intimacy, which is terrifying.

The "What I Really Look Like" Test

Walk into the bathroom, remove all of your make up. Peel of your fake eyelashes, take out your contacts, pull out your hair extensions, remove your bra padding (if you are wearing a bra) and wash off all of your deodorant. Come back to the table, gauge your dates reaction.

The Bum Test

Ask your date if he gives money to Bums. Homeless people are often mentally ill or have become so down-and-out they have completely lost their way. Any man that can not sympathize with that is a DOUCHE BAG. That's right, he does not appreciate his home and he has no regard for other people. Slap your date, steal his wallet, and give it to a bum.

The Bad Attitude Test

For no reason, give your date a huge attitude. Roll your eyes. Three snaps in a BITCH formation. Act like a child. See how much he is willing to deal with, these will be the boundaries of your relationship.

The Banana Test

At any given point of the night, pull a banana out of your purse. Bananas are an excellent source of Fiber. Your date will be shocked, and torn between his  natural urge to make a sexual comment and still act like a gentlemen. Peel the banana, never break eye contact. Ask for spoon. Confused, your date hands you a spoon. Pulverize the banana and then say you're not hungry anymore and you hate bananas.

The Down Talk Test

Talk down to your date. Even if he is 10+ years your senior. Question his intelligence. Interrupt him and quiz him on his random factoid knowledge. Some of my favorites are

*What does LED stand for?

* Random Star Wars/ Lord of the Rings/ and John Wayne trivia.

* Why is the ocean blue?

It is important that your date is intelligent.  At some point in the future you might be expected to interact with other couples.(AH!) He needs to be smart enough for the  both of you so you can hide and get drunk in the corner of a family party/dinner date.

You should seriously consider at least trying out one of these. Otherwise you might find yourself having a meaningful conversation while on a date.

xoxo

Hiding Feather

More makeup advice....

A few techniques I left out from my last makeup tutorial, A Few Humble Suggestions....:

1) I highly recommend investing in a higher end foundation. A little goes a long way and they last for months. Drug store foundation formulas tend to dry your skin out, and gather and crease. Also, higher end foundations are more likely to match your skin tone so you can wear smaller amounts to cover small blemishes, without coating your entire face.

For application: Do not use a sponge. It sucks up all the foundation. Instead, try using a fluffy brush. I know they make foundation brushes, but they're so thick and tightly bound that they tend to just smear the foundation around. I prefer to use something similar to a blush brush. All of the soft little bristles help the foundation apply smoothly and evenly.

Lastly, I recommend using a light and translucent powder to set your foundation. This is a good daytime look. Too much powder can make you look old. We've all seen people with way too much powder and foundation on, and it's not pretty!

2) A few mascara tips:

Don't pump the brush. It puts air in the tube and dries it out. Also, if you think you're getting sick or a virus, throw it out. The virus can live in the tube. Yuck.

Also, don't try to "juice it up" with water. I've seen people try to do this. Just buy a new tube. ;)

For application: Start at the base, and shake the brush as you move outwards. It helps distribute the mascara and separate your eyelashes. For a more dramatic look, layer your mascaras. For example, I use a dryer formula of mascara to separate my lashes, and after they set, I apply a wetter formula that lengthens.

For your bottom lashes, drag the tip of the brush back and forth. Try not to go all of the way across your eye, unless you're going for a very dramatic look. Only go about halfway in, and make sure that you have a little bit of powder on under your eyes, to keep your eyelashes from dotting your cheeks.

3) For the most part, drugstore eyeshadows are relatively the same formula as higher end brands, and work just as well. For more dramatic and bold colors, I go for Mac eyeshadows and Urban Decay. For daytime makeup, I really like Almay's color palettes. You can buy them according to your eye color, and they're cheap.

For application: Invest in a brush. The little sponges they come with are too coarse and don't really do anything. Even using your finger is better than using a sponge or foam.

For a more dramatic look, put a primer on your eyelids. The color will be creamier and stand out. An eyelid primer is like a glue. It holds the makeup in place and it will last all night, like if you're going dancing, or to a concert. ;)

On my next blog, I will discuss eyeshadow application and color combos more in depth. :)

Man Make Up Do's and Dont's.

It simply is not fair that the joys of makeup be exclusive to women! After all, everyone should have a chance at accenting their beauty and hiding their flaws. However Man Make up was a trend of the 80's, right? WRONG!

Man Makeup and the delicate art of man-scaping is being resurrected by modern day Alternative and Glam Rock! What was pioneered by artists like Alice Cooper, The New York Dolls, David Bowie, Twisted Sister, and Kiss (just to name a few) is being upheld by modern day musicians like Green Day, My Chemical Romance, Adam Lambert, Marilyn Manson and Lady Gaga (just kidding). ;P

However Man Make-up can go wrong, hideously wrong!
Here are a few tips to pretty up your boy all while carefully avoiding the evil drag clown look.

Tip 1: Eyes

EYELINER AND LASHES
It is a common fact that men have beautiful and untouched eyelashes. Play it up! Mascara is a great way to open up the eyes and brighten the entire face. Black and brown eyeliner should be applied like it would be on women, close to the lashes. This really is the best look. Men tend to apply their eyeliner like a thirteen-year-old girl discovering make up for the first time. I call this the pre-teen Raccoon look, and it is not pretty. Think the singer of the Cure, Iconic and Amazing? Yes. A little scary? Kind of. Smokey and smeared liner is sexy. Think the singer from My Chemical Romance. Hot

EYESHADOW
Stay far far away from Bright Colors. Some men, as Adam Lambert has shown us, can pull off the darker Blue and Purples. I even use a corn flower blue eyeshadow on Tommy sometimes, but what often comes to mind and also haunt my dreams is the makeup of Dee Snider. I Love Twisted Sister, and I highly doubt beauty was Snider's goal, but the blue eyeshadow up to his brows is a horrible reminiscent of my great aunt Lavina, mixed with an evil clown.

TIP 2: LIPS

LIPSTICKS AND GLOSS

For man Lips I recommend pinks and reds that aren't too far from their natural lip color! For Tommy I use Milani's Hot Pink Lip gloss with glitter. The Hot Pink is muffled by his Olive Skin Tone so it doesn't stand out, just enough to show off his natural pout.


THE OVER ALL GOAL OF MAN MAKE UP

Man Makeup is suppose to highlight their sexiness. I met Tommy in eyeliner and can't picture him any other way. I mean, can you pictures Billy Joe of Green Day without it? Its accents his eye shape and adds to his looks. However there is a fine line between sexy man makeup and drag. There is a stigma that all men who want to wear make up are drag queens and although I love my Drag Queen Friends, it is not to say that all men who rock the glam look are in drag! In my experience doing make up, I have found that 99% of men love having their makeup done; they find it fun, new and exciting! My dad was all about his Pirates of the Caribbean makeup on Halloween. :)

-Chantala


*Disclaimer: I love Lady Gaga, The Cure, Twisted Sister, and all Drag Queens. Esp. Frankie Starr.

My Lucky Connection

In Late 2009, my friend Tommy asked me if I could pretty him up for an audition for American Idol's Adam Lambert! I knew he would get the part, hes a likable person, talented musician, and was already rocking the glam rocker look.

I did him up nice, the management loved his look, and were impressed with his talent, and within a week he was in! His popularity soared after Tommy and Adam's infamous American Music Awards "kiss!"

In Late February, Tommy Asked me how i was promoting my own art. I said that i was just a spec in the world the of art and that i am at a complete loss of where to start! Tommy asked me if I had a Twitter. I said yes but that I only had two followers! He laughed and told me he would help me out. He informed all of his fans that i had done his make up for Adams Birthday Party, and that I had done the painting of of him that is on his MySpace.

With one night I had 150 followers! I could not believe all of the networking potential that I had, now it was up to me to build and maintain it. Although I created my Etsy account months prior, I was yet to make any online sales and was selling at live art shows only. I made my first sale on Etsy a few days after I became active on Twitter and with lots of time and dedication, I have been able to maintain steady sales throughout the past month and a half!

Promoting your own art can be scary. Sometimes its embarrassing to advertise yourself because so much of yourself is put into it! Learning to Promote myself in a constructive and successful way has been my most valuable lesson so far!

Last week I decided to create a feather piece for Adam Lambert. Tommy told me he loves feathers, and there are lots of concert pictures to back that up! I made Adam a Fedora Hat Clip with Pheasant Feathers, Peacock Feathers, Lady Amherst Feathers, and lots of chains, studs and Black Gem Buttons!

I did Tommy's make up for the GLAAD awards last night, and sent my present along with him. This morning he told me that Adam Loved the piece, is gonna wear it on a hat, and he says thank you!

I will be looking out for it, I hope i get a chance to see him wear it.

-Chantala